One time I was on the radio being interviewed and a woman called the show to say that she was recently divorced, but that her ex-husband was still going way out of his way to interfere and make her life miserable. “What should I do?” she asked. What occurred to me to say, because she really did sound upset and angry was “Chances are he’s the last person on earth you want to let you feel this way.” “That’s right,” she said. So, I told her, “The next time he does something that would disturb you, tell him, ‘You’re the last person on earth I’m going to let turn me upside down like this!’” How do you think that would feel? Rather than getting frustrated and angry, you could maintain control, put the situation in perspective immediately, and stop the stress and distress.
If you think about it, it is we who give others the power to make us feel bad. And it’s usually the people or things that we would want to bother us the least that we let get to us! Think about the people and things that annoy you the most. Do you really want them to upset you? Not likely. Then don’t give your power away! Try to rehearse saying, “You’re the last person or thing I’m going to let affect me this way!” Let me know how it goes.
Excerpt from Doctor’s Orders: Go Fishing by Dean Shrock, Ph.D
